You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Found the puke drawer
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
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