lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
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