okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
