this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
