So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
She's the barista slut.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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