so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
and i looked up. we had an audience...
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
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