my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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