I swear she didn't look like that last week.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize