Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
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