he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
