He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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