Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
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