I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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