Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
