Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
