I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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