I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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