question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
