omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
