Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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