oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
