I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
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