What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
Randomize