I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
