If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
