exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
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Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
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You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
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