the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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