Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
