you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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