I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
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