There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize