remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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