i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Drunk is a universal language darling
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
