just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize