adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
