Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
We're using joints as your birthday candles
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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