i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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