who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
nutella sex= disaster
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Sorry about my life...
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
