I'm really into asian looking animals
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
