the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Alive.
So much puke
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Randomize