dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
