FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Randomize
