But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
