brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
