If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Randomize
