Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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