Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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