Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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