There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
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