Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Boobs are out for the taking
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
FUCK WHALES
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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