we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize